MY NAME IS OZYMANDIUS

For a couple of books that I’m sure wingnuts thought were going to change to world, these two look adorable on the $1 remainder shelf at Dollar Tree where I photographed them a couple years back.

“Excuse me while I save the world”, indeed, you bloated dead toad.

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Does this sound familiar?

Being A Compilation of Quotes from Sinclair Lewis’ It Can’t Happen Here, Relevant To Our Present Situation

I:

“Well, what if they are?” protested R. C. Crowley. “It might not be so bad. I don’t like all these irresponsible attacks on us bankers all the time. Of course, Senator Windrip has to pretend publicly to bawl the banks out, but once he gets into power he’ll give the banks their proper influence in the administration and take our expert financial advice. Yes. Why are you so afraid of the word ‘Fascism,’ Doremus? Just a word–just a word! And might not be so bad, with all the lazy bums we got panhandling relief nowadays, and living on my income tax and yours–not so worse to have a real Strong Man, like Hitler or Mussolini–like Napoleon or Bismarck in the good old days–and have ’em really run the country and make it efficient and prosperous again. ‘Nother words, have a doctor who won’t take any back-chat, but really boss the patient and make him get well whether he likes it or not!”

*sigh*.

Look at all the dust.

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted last, and a whole lot has happened – I’ve left Sou’ Ca’lina to return to my hometown of Rochester, NY; I’ve been through a shitty couple years personally, and, speaking of shit, we have a GOP candidate who’s an outright authoritarian running for President. I made a comment in a post a while back about the GOP running a “he-man” for President; little did I know what they’d come up with! And polls are claiming 49% of the voting public want this man to become President. WHAT. THE. FUCK.

There’s a copy of Sinclair Lewis’ It Can’t Happen Here available on the Internet at the Australian Gutenberg site; technically Americans shouldn’t be reading it there because it’s still under copyright here or something, but I’m going to suggest going an reading it anyway. Buzz Windrip is more folksy and countryfied than Trump, but there’s a lot of parallels between the two, and I’m afraid if Trump gets elected somehow it’s going to look a lot like the America in the book.

“Besides,” said Tasbrough, “this chewing the rag is all nonsense, anyway. As Crowley says, might be a good thing to have a strong man in the saddle, but–it just can’t happen here in America.”

And it seemed to Doremus that the softly moving lips of the Reverend Mr. Falck were framing, “The hell it can’t!”

South Carolina, ever classy

We have just such a unique understanding of racial relations down here, we really do:

The poll was conducted by a political scientist from Clemson University, David Woodard, who insisted that it was not meant to be provocative.

“It was designed to take advantage of a political moment of Senator Tim Scott’s election as the first African-American from a southern state since reconstruction,” he told WSPA.

But many voters were, in fact, provoked by questions that asked them to “agree” or “disagree” with statements like, “it’s really a matter of some people not trying hard enough; if blacks would only try harder, they could be as well as whites.”

And people here still wonder why the rest of the damn country look at them strangely.

Getcher boomstick ready

OMG OMG OMG you people it’s finally happening!

The zombie outbreak is here!

News of an imminent zombie invasion in Liberia is perhaps the most audacious fake news story on the Internet right now, creating panic among thousands of gullible readers who are taking it seriously on social media message boards, repeating the rumor among friends, and getting a bit hysterical about the spread of ebola in Dallas, TX.

The right-wing mock news site, Big American News, broke the fake story to its readers on September 30. Since then, the link to the article has been tweeted nearly 1,000 times and shared by more than 500,000 Facebook users.

I mean, hell, we’ve got people running around this country who still think Obama’s a gay Muslim terrorist, who think the British royals are shape-shifting reptiles, who think the 9/11 attacks were done with mini-nukes and holographic planes, and who eat liver pudding. We should be surprised anymore?

While Big American News may be a mock-news source, its sources are not kidding around. Big American News got the story from the popular African news site, AllAfrica.com, which aggregated the ebola zombie story from a Liberian newspaper called New Dawn.

The original story on New Dawn claims:

Two Ebola patients, who died of the virus in separate communities in Nimba County have reportedly resurrected in the county. The victims, both females, believed to be in their 60s and 40s respectively, died of the Ebola virus recently in Hope Village Community and the Catholic Community in Ganta, Nimba.

But to the amazement of residents and onlookers on Monday, the deceased reportedly regained life in total disbelief. The NewDawn Nimba County correspondent said the late Dorris Quoi of Hope Village Community and the second victim only identified as Ma Kebeh, said to be in her late 60s, were about to be taken for burial when they resurrected.

Hopefully FAUX will pick up on this important story soon before it gets too serious.  After all, with the GOP House, and the staffs of Townhall, WorldNetDaily and National Review Online, we’ve got a whole cadre of zombie-immune warriors suitable for the front lines of World War Derp.

SimpsonsLead

The 149 year cease-fire

Welp, it’s Election time again, and the Democratic Gubernatorial challenger here in South Ca’lina has had the GALL to object to the Confederate battle flag flying outside the State House, right across from Main Street.

“Piffle”, says our Governor:

South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley (R) on Tuesday said that there was no need to remove the Confederate battle flag from the Statehouse grounds because it was not an issue for CEOs, and the state had “fixed” racist perceptions by electing an Indian-American governor.

Oh, hey, what’s that about CEOs?

“What I can tell you is over the last three and a half years, I spent a lot of my days on the phones with CEOs and recruiting jobs to this state,” the governor noted. “I can honestly say I have not had one conversation with a single CEO about the Confederate flag.”

Oh, WELL. CEOs.

After all, it’s not like we haven’t made giant strides in rehabilitating our image nationwide:

Haley said that she had tried to improve the perception of the state by ordering employees to answer the phone with the phrase “it’s a great day in South Carolina.”

“But we really kind of fixed all that when you elected the first Indian-American female governor,” she insisted. “When we appointed the first African-American U.S. senator, that sent a huge message.”

Some of our best friends are… nnn…iii… those people! And I’ve almost gotten to the point I can call our government offices and not have to repress giggling at how the phones are answered.

I mean, just because South Carolina’s elected officials and GOP representatives keep popping off with outrageous racist bull, you’d think we had some sort of problem down here. Nothing could be more wrong!

For example, at least we’re not calling for martial law.

Yet.