OMG OMG OMG you people it’s finally happening!
The zombie outbreak is here!
News of an imminent zombie invasion in Liberia is perhaps the most audacious fake news story on the Internet right now, creating panic among thousands of gullible readers who are taking it seriously on social media message boards, repeating the rumor among friends, and getting a bit hysterical about the spread of ebola in Dallas, TX.
The right-wing mock news site, Big American News, broke the fake story to its readers on September 30. Since then, the link to the article has been tweeted nearly 1,000 times and shared by more than 500,000 Facebook users.
I mean, hell, we’ve got people running around this country who still think Obama’s a gay Muslim terrorist, who think the British royals are shape-shifting reptiles, who think the 9/11 attacks were done with mini-nukes and holographic planes, and who eat liver pudding. We should be surprised anymore?
While Big American News may be a mock-news source, its sources are not kidding around. Big American News got the story from the popular African news site, AllAfrica.com, which aggregated the ebola zombie story from a Liberian newspaper called New Dawn.
The original story on New Dawn claims:
Two Ebola patients, who died of the virus in separate communities in Nimba County have reportedly resurrected in the county. The victims, both females, believed to be in their 60s and 40s respectively, died of the Ebola virus recently in Hope Village Community and the Catholic Community in Ganta, Nimba.
But to the amazement of residents and onlookers on Monday, the deceased reportedly regained life in total disbelief. The NewDawn Nimba County correspondent said the late Dorris Quoi of Hope Village Community and the second victim only identified as Ma Kebeh, said to be in her late 60s, were about to be taken for burial when they resurrected.
Hopefully FAUX will pick up on this important story soon before it gets too serious. After all, with the GOP House, and the staffs of Townhall, WorldNetDaily and National Review Online, we’ve got a whole cadre of zombie-immune warriors suitable for the front lines of World War Derp.